[Fic] OHSHC - Rush Week

[kitsunerei88]

A few of you probably remember the OHSHC piece I posted for the ouran_contest Special Challenge about six months ago, which was an AU setting the characters in university craziness. The chapter posted, "The Demon of Med School Mania" was the second chapter (because I didn't like how the first chapter on Rush Week turned out).

Well, this is the first chapter of that particular AU. It's STILL not as entertaining and fun as I'd LIKE it to be, but I reread it again (about half a year after writing it), and it's not TERRIBLE, so it's getting posted anyway. I have too much fun at school to want this AU to end . . . but to get to that fun stuff, there has to be a set-up, and I suppose this chapter is it. I apologize in advance for anyone actually in a frat/sorority.

Title: University: Rush Week
Rating: G
Genre: Comedy/General
Pairings or Characters: None in particular
Warnings: Severe randomness. No research done whatsoever. This is not meant to be serious.
Summary: When Haruhi graduated Ouran, she thought she was leaving the insanity behind.
Disclaimer: Ouran High School Host Club is the property of Bisco Hatori. Yay.

Author’s Notes: Sometimes, my university can do some very strange, usually frustrating things. Sometimes at university, you meet very weird, frustrating people. And then I thought “What if Haruhi had to deal with it?” Also, this is a general after-the-series thing, not particularly after the anime.

University: Rush Week

Haruhi collapsed into the plastic chair, dropping her bag onto the tiled floor. She put her head down onto the table and sucked in several gasps of air, exhausted. Running was one of those things she had never been good at.

“Eleven minutes. You’re one minute late, Haruhi,” Kyouya looked up from his textbook. Haruhi glared at him. He had changed very little from the last time she had seen him, at his graduation – he still wore those thin-rimmed glasses, still wore his hair the same way, and even though they were no longer required a uniform, still wore a business-like jacket over his neatly pressed button-up shirt and tie.

“Haruhi!” Tamaki, on the other hand, was more than delighted to see her, wrapping his arms around her. Too tired to shake him off, she didn’t reply, glaring instead on the glasses-wearing youth beside him. She had seen Tamaki far more often than any of the other graduates; while they somehow, by some strange twist of fate, had all chosen to attend the same university, he had come to visit Ouran far more often. I can’t really escape from them, can I? She wondered rebelliously, and then dismissed the thought. Her university was quite well known, after all.

“Do you know how far it is to the Law building?” she demanded, her voice sounding wispy and ragged. “I don’t think it’s even possible to run that in less than ten minutes!”

“It’s not,” he said, flipping the page of his textbook. “For you, anyway.”

Haruhi drew in one last breath of air as the world stopped spinning. Running was definitely something she was going to have to get better at in the next few days, particularly if Tamaki insisted on the former Ouran Host Club meeting for lunch as many of the days of the week as possible. She saw that Honey was sitting across the table from her, a familiar smile on his face and a plate of cake in front of him. To his right, Mori sat, a book open in front of him as well. The twins completed the circle, sitting side by side.

“Haruhi, Haruhi!” Honey said, as she finished catching her breath. “How was your morning? What do you think of the university?”

“It’s a maze. Why is the first floor the second floor in the law building? And why do I only have one class in the law building even though I’m in law?” Haruhi pulled out her bento from her backpack and began eating ferociously. “And I don’t have another class for five hours! What am I supposed to do until then?”

“Study?” Kaoru suggested with a shrug. “I’ve already been assigned the first three cantos of The Iliad. It’s not that bad. Hikaru got lost on the way to his first class, Honey-senpai had to take him there.”

Hikaru glared at his brother, grimacing at the memory. “Do you know how to get to the chemistry building? You have to start in the Math building, and then you go into this tunnel, that you can only get into by one stairwell, and then you take this tunnel to the Actuarial Science building, where you find and get into another tunnel, and then you have to take this tunnel to the Geology building, where you find another tunnel, and the doors to the Chemistry building are in the tunnels between the Geology and Natural Science buildings.” He scowled.

“Besides that,” Kaoru grinned. “Have you decided what fraternity to join? Both Hikaru and I have been approached by Omega Zeta Pi and Sigma Nu. It is Rush Week.”

“I personally like Omega Zeta Pi more, but Kaoru likes Sigma Nu,” Hikaru continued. “But I sort of want to see if we’ll get any more offers before committing to any.”

“I was under the impression that Haruhi was now openly female. So wouldn’t it be more appropriate for her to join a sorority?” The question, formally worded, came from Kyouya. He was still leaning over the massive textbook.

“You can join my fraternity, Haruhi!” Tamaki gave his characteristic dashing smile and wrapped an arm around her. “Kappa Tau! We spend a lot of time doing international events and service learning!” He turned to the twins, a contemplative look slipping onto his face. “And you’re invited too, I suppose,” he conceded.

Somehow, the whole thing sounded like the Ouran Host Club, minus the serving rich people aspect. “No thanks,” Haruhi pulled herself away from him, ignoring his pout. “I think I want to focus on studying here.”

“Good luck with that,” the statement, surprisingly, came from behind her. A group of four boys stood there, as immaculately dressed as if she was still at Ouran. The boy who had spoken gave her a roguish grin and turned to the Hitachiins.

“You’re the Hitachiin twins, aren’t you?” he asked, but went on without waiting for an answer. “Alpha Eta’s having our open house this Friday, do you want to come? It’ll be a really good time.”

“But not as good of a time as if you come to our open house.” Another boy, with sandy hair and bright hazel eyes cut in. “We’re,” he gestured to himself and one of the other boys in the group. Haruhi noticed that those two stood slightly apart from the Alpha Eta boys. “We’re Phi Lambda Pi. Our open house is on Saturday. Of course, you could go to Alpha Eta’s celebration, but after you come to ours, you’ll have to admit that we’re better.” His eyes flickered over to Kyouya. “Ohtori-san, you’re of course more than welcome too. We hope you’ll join us this year.”

“Are you kidding me?” The first boy, the Alpha Eta one, spoke again. His dark hair flopped into his eyes, and he brushed them impatiently out of the way. “Nothing Phi Lambda Pi would throw could ever hope to match an Alpha Eta party! And Ohtori-san has already expressed interest in us, so why even try?” He turned back to the table with a pressed smile. “Anyway, we’re just here to welcome you to university, and we hope you’ll join us.”

“I’ll definitely consider it,” Kyouya looked up and smiled with the same charm that Haruhi remembered. And that he had of course used only when there was something to be gained from it.

“We will too,” Kaoru rushed to assure the boy. With a smile, the Alpha Eta boys disappeared. The Phi Lambda Pi boys scowled at them, but turned to the table with a smile. Somehow, Haruhi suspected that this one might have actually been genuine. “Well, that was certainly immature, wasn’t it?” he said cheerfully. “Anyway, our open house and welcoming party is on Saturday, so don’t forget. Ohtori-kun, you already know where we are.”

“I do indeed,” Kyouya again gave that charming smile. “If I recall correctly, your parties are always very . . . unique.”

“Awesome. We’ll see you there, then.” With a nod, they, too, disappeared into the crowd.

“Are their parties very unique?” Honey asked, when they were out of earshot. “I went to the Sigma Nu open house in first year. It didn’t seem very interesting to me.”

“Of course not. They get drunk, watch porn, and vomit. Sometimes a sorority comes, and then they get drunk, have sex, and vomit.”

“Then why even go?” Haruhi asked, without really paying attention. She had finished her bento and was fishing out her Introduction to Civil Law textbook from her backpack. She would have to get a new backpack soon – she seemed to have glaring gaps in her schedule, and studying during them was certainly a good idea. A bigger backpack would be imperative, particularly if she had to carry multiple textbooks.

“The president of Phi Lambda Pi stands to inherit an airline company. Conversely, the president of Alpha Eta is the inheritor a fortune and will one day be a capable investor.” Kyouya shrugged. “Why join one when more connections will be made if I don’t join any and simply pretend that I am interested?”

“You could always join Kappa Tau, Kyouya,” Tamaki interrupted. “We hardly drink at all. We’re mostly concerned with exposure to international culture and service learning!”

“Which is why Kappa Tau is at the bottom of the pan-Hellenic food chain, Tamaki,” Kyouya replied patiently, returning to his textbook.

“What about you?” Hikaru turned to Honey and Mori. “Didn’t you join a fraternity?”

Mori shook his head as Honey made a face. “Beer is really bitter and icky,” he explained. “I might have if they had cake. But it was hard to get them to take no for an answer.”

“What happened?” Kaoru asked, curious.

“Mitsukuni threw the Omega Zeta Pi president at the time,” Mori explained, poker-faced.

“It was okay. He was on the karate team too,” Honey defended himself, smiling. “He really should have been expecting it. Though, Tama-chan tried to join all of the fraternities when he got here! They all threw him out, except Kappa Tau. Kappa Tau’s the lowest of all the fraternities though, and last year they were in danger of having their charter taken away, so Tama-chan put it back on its feet.”

“Kappa Tau was the best of them anyway,” Tamaki said dismissively. “Alcohol destroys brain tissue, and we really are the most sophisticated of them all.”

“But you didn’t join Kappa Tau?” Haruhi asked, turning to Honey and Mori. “I would have thought that you would have.”

Honey shook his head. “I’m the president of the Math Students Association, and Takashi is on varsity kendo. We sometimes go to Kappa Tau events, but we don’t really have the time.” He chewed thoughtfully on his cake. “Their charity concert last year was very good.”

“Ohtori-kun!” The shout, clear as a bell and carrying a distinct Osakan accent, cut through the cafeteria’s buzz. The speaker, a girl carrying a textbook as large as Kyouya’s under one arm and a large mug of coffee in her other hand, fought her way through the lunchtime crowd. “Oh, I’m so glad I found you!”

“Shimatani-san,” Kyouya, surprisingly, looked up from the book. “How was your summer?”

“Pretty good, considering I spent it locked in a non-air-conditioned room in the Geology basement with Seiichi-kun doing underpaid undergraduate research,” she replied brusquely. “Anyway, you’re in Advanced Physics this year with me, right?”

Kyouya gestured to his textbook, which Haruhi noted was the exact same as the one the girl was carrying. “Why ask questions when you already know the answer?”

“Because it’s polite,” she replied, barging on loudly. “Do you have a lab partner yet? If you don’t, will you please be my lab partner? If I have to pair up with someone like Takao-san again, I might have to kill myself. Or her. ‘My calculator sometimes changes the twos and threes?’ Please, spare me from having to endure that again.” The girl bowed deeply, a desperate look on her face. Haruhi was impressed that she somehow managed not to spill the coffee.

Kyouya appeared to consider it for a moment. “All right,” he agreed finally. “Though I don’t see why you’re not pairing up with Ikutsuki-san or Miyano-san.”

“Seiichi-kun paired up with Chiaki-san, and Ayu-chan paired up with Mimori-san,” the girl took a deep breath, apparently of relief, and took a large gulp from her coffee mug. She appeared to notice the rest of the people sitting around the table for the first time. “Oh,” she said mildly, bowing again. “Salut, Suoh-san, Haninozuka-senpai.” She turned back to Kyouya. “I’ll see you in lab tomorrow,” she said, turning away. She paused and glanced back over her shoulder. “And you could call me ‘Hikari-chan,’ you know. We only sat together just about every day last year in calculus.”

“Who was she?” Haruhi asked curiously when she was gone. The girl had passed through like a hurricane, loudly announcing what she wanted and leaving right afterwards. “I don’t think I’ve seen you being so nice to someone when you didn’t have something in it for yourself.”

“Hikari Shimatani is the top geophysics student at the school,” Kyouya replied. “I’m considering hiring her to find oil and other mineral ores. Honey-senpai probably knows her through the math department though; she minors in math.”

“Not really,” Honey shrugged. “I’ve seen her around the Math building, but I’ve never spoken to her. But she’ll be a member of the Math Students Association, so that’s why she recognizes me.”

“And she was in my French class last year,” Tamaki threw in cheerfully. “She also plays an alternate violin in the open orchestra.”

“Doesn’t that mean she sucks?” Hikaru cut in impatiently. “Alternates are only in when the real ones can’t make it, right?”

***

Haruhi slipped quietly into one of the larger libraries on campus. This in particular was the Science library, but she had heard that it was the largest library on campus and would almost certainly have a free table. It had taken some time to get away from Tamaki and the others, though she had to admit that she didn’t really mind. It was nice to catch up with them, she reflected. Kyouya had barely changed at all, now in his second year of a concurrent physics and business degree. Tamaki was repeating first year; having hated his business program so much, he had switched over to music. She supposed that Honey and Mori had followed more or less predictable paths; the short blonde had continued with mathematics, and his guardian with history. Kaoru had chosen to study literature, while Hikaru had chosen chemistry, perhaps showing how much the two had grown as individuals over the years.

Ah, Honey-senpai had been right – she had found a table with relative ease. She shook her head, setting her backpack down at an empty table and pulling out her books. She expected that she would see far more of them this year, which she supposed wasn’t a bad thing.

What she didn’t expect, however, were the two blonde girls who plunked themselves down across from her.

“You’re Haruhi Fujioka, right?” One of them smiled, showing a perfectly even set of teeth. Her hair fell into ringlets, cascading over her shoulders. “I’m Juri Takano. This,” she gestured at her friend, “is Akaho Hayase. We’re from Delta Omicron. You’re friends with the Hitachiin twins?”

Haruhi blinked. She’d barely had time to crack open her textbook. It was like a repeat of lunch, only instead of targeting the twins and Kyouya, they were now approaching her. “I suppose so,” she replied slowly. “Why?”

“You’re also friends with Suoh-san and Ohtori-san?” The girl, Takano, continued expectantly.

“I suppose so,” Haruhi repeated, tilting her head sideways. Though on reflection, maybe it was them who were friends with her? If she’d never broken that vase, she never would have gotten them as friends, after all. Who knew?

“Well, Delta Omicron’s having our open house tomorrow. Why don’t you come join us?” the girl continued on, oblivious to Haruhi’s inattentiveness. “We do a lot of volunteer work, so we look really good on resumes and stuff. And it’s just a great community and all.”

Haruhi hesitated. She’d heard enough about sororities and fraternities at lunch from the others, enough to know that she wasn’t really interested in joining one. She was at university to study, not to party. And if they did all that community service, why did they bother picking and choosing people by their backgrounds?

“I don’t know,” she hedged politely. From what she’d heard, they also cost a lot of money to join, money that she didn’t have. “I think I’ll be busy with studying.”

“Oh, come on,” the second girl piped up. Hayase-san, wasn’t it? “It’s only the first week of school. Chill out, party, make friends. We won’t even have handed in assignments for another week.”

“I really think I should study though,” Haruhi continued, feeling pressed. Was there any polite way out of this? “I’ll . . .” she paused, hesitating. “I’ll consider it though. Thank you.”

“Great!” the first girl said, beaming. “We’ll see you tomorrow, then!”

“Definitely,” the second girl echoed. “It’ll be awesome. See you tomorrow.” With that said, they walked away, chatting to each other.

Haruhi shook her head, dumbfounded, and opened her textbook. Scarcely five minutes later, another girl sat down across from her, pulling out a piece of paper.

“Hey,” she said. “I’m Mizuki Shiomi. You’re Haruhi Fujioka, aren’t you?”

Haruhi looked up from her textbook suspiciously. This sounded suspiciously like the last girls’ sales pitch too. “Yes,” she replied carefully.

“I’m in the Chi Iota Phi sorority. Pleased to meet you,” the girl held out her hand eagerly. “Anyway, I was wondering, are you interested in joining a sorority?”

Haruhi shook her hand cautiously. “No,” she replied, her tone blunt. “I’m not.”

“Well,” the girl hesitated. Maybe no one had given her the negative answer yet? “Well, it’s a really good experience, we do a lot of community service and volunteer work. We hold a huge fashion show every year, and all proceeds go to charity. Anyway, here’s our contact information.” She moved the sheet of paper across the table. “I really hope you’ll be in touch,” she said, pulling her bag off of the chair. She gave a shy smile and moved off into the stacks.

Haruhi sighed. But when the third group of girls, this time from Xi Theta, showed up, she decided it was definitely time to move to a different floor.

What she didn’t count on was the fourth group, from Kappa Lambda Mu, to follow her.

“Hey, you’re Haruhi Fujioka, right?” the three girls chimed simultaneously. They looked like triplets, though for some reason Haruhi didn’t think they actually were triplets. They all dressed identically, talked identically, and moved identically.

“No,” she replied bluntly. It was time for desperate measures. She’d only been approached by four sororities in the past hour, and this was really beginning to cut in on her study time. “No, I’m not Haruhi Fujioka.”

“Oh.” The girls paused, looking at each other, utterly confused. “Well . . .”

One girl frowned, determined, and said, “No, you’re Haruhi Fujioka. The girls from Chi Iota Phi were trying to recruit you.”

Haruhi found herself crabbily saying what Kyouya had said at lunch. “Why ask questions when you already know the answer?”

They didn’t bother with an answer. The girl standing in the middle held out a piece of paper. “Our open house is this Saturday. Here are directions. We hope to see you there!” The girls giggled, evidently convinced that they had just given Haruhi the highest honour possible, and clomped back down the stairs.

Haruhi stood up, slamming her books back into her backpack. Clearly, studying in this library wasn’t going to work. Perhaps another building would. Preferably, one that was card-locked on all sides . . .

“Hey,” a lone girl had approached while Haruhi had been busy thinking of locations to go. “Hey, I’m Megumi Takao.”

“Sorry,” Haruhi replied, trying to remain as polite as possible. “I’ve got to go to class.” She slung the backpack over her shoulder, and walked quickly to the stairs.

The girl, uncertain, followed. “Well, I’m from Alpha Rho, and we were wondering if you were interested in joining our sorority?”

Haruhi only walked faster. She had come to the realization that saying she wasn’t interested was not an effective strategy to make them go away.

“Well, of course you’re interested,” the girl flipped her hair over her shoulder and matched Haruhi’s pace easily. “I mean, Alpha Rho. There isn’t a better sorority to join!”

Haruhi broke into a run, nearly falling down the stairs in her desire to get away, colliding with another girl at the foot of the stairs.

“Oh!” The girl blinked as Haruhi shoved her way past her. “Oh, hey, I know you! You were sitting with Ohtori-kun this morning!”

No, Haruhi didn’t want to hear this either. This was almost inevitably a prelude into a request to join some other sorority. How many sororities were there on campus anyway? Was her association with the former Ouran High School Host Club going to make her a target for every single one of them?

She didn’t notice the other girl’s eyes widen as she realized who Haruhi was being chased by.

“Scholars Building,” the girl said, catching up easily, despite her massive textbook in her arms. “Takao-san can’t get in – she failed four of five classes last term. It’s card-locked, but if you’re friends with Ohtori-kun, you’re probably a Scholar too.”

Haruhi stopped, surprised. “I . . . am a Scholar, actually,” she realized. “You’re Shimatani-san, aren’t you? Where’s the Scholar’s Building?”

“Shimatani-san!” Takao’s voice rang gaily through the library’s main floor. “Oh, it’s good to see you! How was your summer?”

“Oh, oh . . .” the other girl’s face creased painfully. “Um, it was good. I have to go, uh, study. See you. Move.” This last comment, quiet, was directed at Haruhi. “I’ll take you there, but we’ll have to run.”

“Anyway, Fujioka-san,” Takao’s voice followed behind them, but Haruhi didn’t dare glance behind her to see how close she was. “Alpha Rho has their open house on Friday! Stop, so I can give you a map!”

Haruhi tried to will herself to run faster, and was surprised to see that she was keeping pace with Shimatani. Either she had gotten a lot faster, or Shimatani wasn’t a fast runner either. Out of the library they flew, and she ran past the Natural Sciences building, past the Physics building, past the Social Science building, and stopped when she nearly collided with a wall. The building was one of the newer ones on campus, designed to match the old collegiate gothic look, but had a card lock on the door.

“Come on, come on,” the other girl panted, fumbling for her student ID. “Found it.”

“Hurry. She’s only twenty feet away.”

“We’re in,” the other girl pronounced, yanking Haruhi through the heavy doors and slamming it shut. “Oh god. I don’t want to talk to her.”

Haruhi, to her immense surprise, began to laugh. Clearly there were things that changed, and there were things that didn’t. Yes, she was now at university. She was now openly female. But she was still grouped in with the former Ouran High School Host Club, and they were still causing her immense amounts of trouble, even if they didn’t mean to. And she still couldn’t find a quiet place to study, and most of all, she was still being chased by girls.

***

More Author’s Notes:

Huge campuses, confusing buildings, and messed up timetables sound familiar to anyone? ^^ Also, the instructions that Hikaru gives to the fictional Chemistry building is actually one of the routes on my campus, though I changed the building names. Yes, we have that many tunnels.

The textbook that Kyouya and the OC were carrying, that’s actually my second year physics textbook. It is 1714 pages long, 2.3 inches thick and weighs 7.3 pounds, and is entitled “University Physics: 11^th Edition.” Trust me – bringing this thing to school sucks. And “My calculator changes the twos and threes?” Yes, this was what one of my friends’ lab partners told her in first year physics.

Some of you may have taken offence at my mild fraternity/sorority bashing. I don’t personally know what to think about them, other than they seem to me like a way of buying friends, particularly other rich friends. I realize that most of them do more than drink, and they hold charity events and so on, however it doesn’t change my perception that they party a lot. Or maybe that Alpha Gamma Delta girl who copied my labs all last year really turned me off them. As for sorority and fraternity stalking? I actually know two people who were stalked my sororities, who had to keep saying “No, I don’t want to join!” over and over for months before they left them alone.

.